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June 17, 2005
Fake Problems
Like Nanda, I’m beat. I haven’t been sleeping too much-maybe 5 or 6 hours a night-and it caught up to me today. My partner at work is exhausted too b/c he couldn’t sleep last night so we are mostly communicating in monosyllabic words and minimal phrases. I couldn’t swim this morning b/c I had to be at work early (okay, I had to be here at 9-but I was up until 1:30 AM) so I am trying to decide what I want to do tonight-go swimming after happy hour with my boss and team? Or follow happy hour with a night “out” with some friends from undergrad? Or just go home after happy hour and clean and then crash? This morning I couldn’t decide what I would want to do later tonight so I have two changes of clothes with me-gym clothes and night out clothes. I have lots of other stuff with me too. I have SO MUCH STUFF with me.
I just used my lunch hour to hit up the gym and do some core stuff and stretching, both of which have been slightly neglected this week. It was nice to do something active as the morning was kind of stressful. Now, just for fun, I am using my new “work” ice pack with my leg propped up on another intern’s CPU. He hasn’t commented.
Let me lay out a scenario and you can help me decided what to do here. My college ex is in town with his band and they are playing in Maryland Saturday night. Friends are coming in from NY and Boston to see the band. Other friends from DC are going. I guess it’s a big deal b/c it’s their first east coast show in years. I do NOT want to go. If I go, the people in the room will be: my ex, me, his ex from after me, his current girlfriend, his ex from after me’s new boyfriends, and his ex from after me’s other ex. I know 3/5 of those people. It is a giant soap opera and I have no desire to be there-but I was invited by my ex and all these mutual friends are coming into town and want me to go just so I can hang out with everyone. Also, there is a song my ex wrote about us and I don’t want to be ungrateful or mean since it IS kind cool (how horrible to write a song about someone and then not have then come to your show??)-and I do kind of want to hear it performed live. It also looks really odd I am not going since all the other exes and college friends are going. But what am I supposed to do while they are performing-dance, sing along, and cheer at the stage like everyone else? I will just spend the whole night not knowing what to do with myself while all my other friends party and have a wonderful time. PLUS, my friends will be looking at me wondering if I regret breaking up with him now that he's doing so well. I've gotten that question before and it is a HORRIBLE question (what kind of person do people think I am?) and I don't want people looking at me all night wondering what I'm thinking and/or feeling sorry for me. But isn't it horrible I know him so well and aren't going to support him and his band?
I know what I plan on doing, but in this situation, what would YOU do? (I titled this entry Fake Problems b/c this is not a real problem. I guess it's good nothing more traumatic is going on my life and I have the leisure to worry about this crap-but also kind of annoying. Is there nothing more meaningful going on in my professional or personal life???) I need some peanut butter...
Enjoy your weekends all!
Posted by Audrey at June 17, 2005 04:05 PM
Comments
Wow, such drama. I wish my life would be that exciting :-)
If it were me, I would go, just because I'd be too curious not to. However, I tend to get along pretty well with my exes (James, for instance). However, if it's something that would make you that uncomfortable, why put yourself in that situation?
Your entry also made me think that it's a good thing that I don't have a social life. If I had to decide between a second workout and going out, it would be hard to pick the gym. Instead, it's Friday night, and I'm deciding between cleaning the apartment and going to the gym, so the gym wins easily!
Posted by: Alison at June 17, 2005 07:00 PM
Don't go
Posted by: Dawn at June 17, 2005 07:39 PM
I must say Alison, I wondered about you and James - and my suspicions were correct! :)
Sorry I have no advice for you Audrey. I'm terrible at stuff like that. O was basically my first boyfriend and I married him - so no ex(es) to deal with! Either way, I hope you have fun!
Posted by: Beth at June 17, 2005 08:54 PM
I have to agree with Alison, I would be curious...especially about the other exes. I also tend to get along pretty well with most of my exes, so it would not be quite as awkward (but still kind of awkward). I know what you mean about standing around and not knowing what to do. I'm glad that you already made your decision and are not basing it on what any of us would do.
Blondie
Posted by: Blondie at June 18, 2005 12:45 PM
Ok first... no idea Alison went out with James. Quite a "whaaat?!" there. haha.
Second, by the time I'm reading this your weekend already happened but if it'd been me I would have gone if I didn't have any feelings whatsoever left for the guy, but wouldn't go if I did. Weird I can deal with but seeing someone I like with someone else or something like that, not so much.... Now I'm eager to see what you did do...!!!!
Posted by: Nanda at June 19, 2005 10:19 PM