« Quiet, Productive Day | Main | Paranoia »
October 19, 2004
Pondering
While I hate to complain, my entire body, especially the lower half, seems to be in pain and tired for no reason. Not agonizing pain or anything, but my left hamstring hurts, my right hip is sore, and my upper back has been super tight since the weekend. All this negativity didn't make me motivated to workout, but I had to do something or else I would've been in a terrible mood. This may be a monthly trend because I remember feeling this same way a couple months ago...I ought to start keeping track.
After warming up with the usual 3 sets of push ups - 10 count body builders and ab exercises, I jumped onto the elliptical for 30 minutes. The first ten minutes were mental torture even with music, but by the time 30 rolled around, I wanted to go longer. I promised myself to go easy on the legs, though, so I lifted instead. It actually ended being a good upper body session. I felt strong and didn't take much rest between exercises. The power went out just as I was finishing up my last set of bicep curls.
On a non-running note, I may be up for some new work challenges shortly. And no or less shift/weekend work, which would make me very, very happy. My program manager B., also a Reserve Marine officer, may get called up next month for a one-year assignment in Germany (better than the desert!). If his orders materialize, I become the official deputy PM. I sort of function informally in that role now but only with trivial things. Our prospective PM is a real change catalyst and wants to delegate responsibility to the lowest level...exactly what everyone wants to feel challenged and improve morale. B. asked me last week if I wanted to be PM, but I thought the other guy was more experienced...and honestly, I have more pressing priorities right now like family, running, finishing grad school, and my Reserve career. I would have to give up the Marine Corps and cut back running to put in 110% effort because my work place is so screwed up! I feel like I still have unrealized running potential, and I want to push myself to the max (as I get healthier) to see what comes of it. And I'm not getting any younger. Am I a slacker for not stepping up to the PM position? I just hope I get another opportunity down the road, perhaps on another contract, for big time leadership and management responsibilities. Since I got in this business, I've always wanted the challenge of managing a multi-million dollar IT/defense project. I need to stop worrying about my decision and refocus on the future big picture. And I need to get to bed.
Posted by Leilani at October 19, 2004 10:52 PM
Comments
You do have unrealized potential--we both know it. I'm finally done with tests and will call you this weekend!
Posted by: becky at October 21, 2004 10:09 PM